Nightmare

I think the worst mistake in life is to wonder, What if? I'd rather fail miserably pursuing my dreams than succeed at something i have to settle for.

 

 Wassup readers. Prom's finally over, finally. Don't really have the mood to update about prom or post photos on it, so is interested, feel free to visit https://www.facebook.com/lynette.kua.shi.yu and browse under photos of Lynette x)

  Here's a brief update on what i've been up to.

So, it was prom. My date: Lim Wen Le. Age: 16. Height: 163cm? Weight: (sensitive). Status: Married to Lynette Kua. HAHAHAAH! Alright. Apparently funk up put up a performance but no one really appreciates our effort! It's alright alright. So, once again, here's us. 

Funk Up Dance Crew.

I had enough of all the girly and being pretty stuffs. The following day, went to punggol park connector with netballers for a good tanning. Not really, it was actually an outing to hike. x) But i was quite badly tanned. Had talks with my juniors, hope i did manage to influence them a little here and there. 

In the afternoon, went to gym. No wonder where my sudden motivation to exercise came from. Maybe i felt that the hike all morning wasn't working on my muscles enough. At night, went for DFUNKATRON practice with my girls, joy and gina <3 2="2" and="and" ann="ann" audition="audition" but="but" by="by" competition="competition" crazy="crazy" have="have" i="i" is="is" it.="it." it="it" item="item" joining="joining" kpop="kpop" loving="loving" ngee="ngee" only="only" organised="organised" our="our" p="p" part="part" perfect="perfect" poly="poly" practice="practice" practices="practices" re="re" s="s" sat="sat" so="so" the="the" this="this" to="to" we="we">

 1st Dec, work.

2nd dec. It's sunday! I love sundays because it's dance day! went for AHA practice then rushed down for dance factory. Feeling anti social today and hid in a corner of the room, covered by the tall piano. Felt a little better after Amantha came. I think because i didn't have any friends there so sad! :( Love hiphop choreographys! I was trying very hard to not feel shy and awkward hahhas. Okay, rushed back to lavender for dance. BLAHBLAHBLAH. every dance day is an enjoyable day.

3rd dec, 4E1'2012 BBQ. Supposed to have our BBQ at punggol park, but the weather wasn't favourable. Wasted the pit booking money, shifted to damien's huge terrace house to BBQ ;) Stayover at damien's, played PS3. can't believe i actually touched and played that kind of things HAHAHA I swear i've never even played a PSP before. It's a spamming fighting game & to my surprise, i sort of enjoyed it x)
Here's group photos :D

The next day, woke up to Mac Breakfast and slack around at Heartland Mall before heading home! :)

Met up with SiQi for additional dance practice. She just finished her A's and it's time to dance again ;) Taught her the new steps and told her abit about the messy formations which i myself ain't familiar with x)

At night, went night cycling with yongsen and zonghong. I hate to admit but i eat lika monster. Bought 2 ice creams with bread! HAHA, into eating recently i don't know why. Maybe it's because i'm dancing again and i find it okay to eat HIAKHIAK :D

Today, i rotted at home the whole morning to afternoon. Tried to learn a few english songs on piano but my perseverance only lasted me through the INTROS of each songs. Currently i've got a little more mood to learn the song: Fall For You and i've accomplished a little more for that song! Tried other songs like payphone, Never getting back together. Couldn't find the songs that i really like to play on piano (折叠式爱情 (Chinese POP) and the way to breakup (KPOP)). Finally, my life began at night when i went to watch breaking dawn with xintao @ VivoCity. We've been brainstorming of what to do the whole night the day before, and finally she gave in to my request of watching breaking dawn (cause she's no fan of twilight). That's how nice she is, always giving in and letting me since last time. A sense of guilty pinched me, but i'm really grateful for her :D 

This is us during secondary 1, one of the investiture rehearsals wohoooooo! :D

 

Alright, my brief update seemed to be over-updated due to the many pictures xD I shall start, my thoughts writing. 

During the class BBQ, i asked them a question which i'm always curious yet i myself haven't really thought about it before. Why not you think about it too, it'll help you understand your goals better. FRIENDS, PARTNER (BF/GF) AND CAREER. Priorities them. 

well, i was pretty shocked to hear a few guys placed girlfriends as their first priority. But none of the girls placed boyfriends as their first priority. The reason why i didn't include family inside the list is family ought to be the first no matter what ;)  So here's my priorities :

1) Career

2) Boyfriend

3) Friends

After hearing this, i believe some of you will judge me like i placed friends last , i'm not a true friend. HAHAS, i swear i'll commit to all but if i really have to prioritize, here's it. Here's what i feel and think. 

I do admit there are a few friends in my life that i would really hate to lose. I don't mean when i'm pursuing my dream, i'd betray or backstab a friend to get where i want. What i meant was if i really have to give up one friendship to achieve my dreams, why not?  

I'm the girl who stays at home each day thinking of the reason i'm living for. Why are there so many talents out there, people who succeeded with purely hard work yet i'm here doing nothing about my life. But mostly things that go on my mind just slip off so easily. So i really need to write them down and work on them, now. 

You know those friends are special when you can text them all day and not get bored, when they can sense it when you're not alright, when they make you laugh at texts just like how your crush can :)

The nice side of me. 

Well, i would like to talk about the reason why i write cards to people. Usually, i write cards to show my appreciation to the person. It's really simple. As me myself, i'm super easily touched and thankful for every person in my life. Don't think it's just classmates, this guy talked to you, chatted with you, and studied with you through the hardest times (O levels) . And that's how i always ended up writing long letters for my friends. Also, another reason is because when i am reminded that i may be the last time we're really gonna interact, i'll feel sad so i'd like to extent my gratitude first. Next, it's not that i'm too free and like to spend time planning suprise birthday parties for friends and get blamed when it's not surprising enough... I just feel, birthday's a special thing. It's a chance to bond, a special day worth celebrating for. And many of my friends, who ain't that outgoing like me who have more friends to celebrate with, will just spend their birthday like any other day at home, with a few friends wishing them happy birthday through texts. I find it very sad. So, as their friend, i plan birthday parties for them. Isn't any birthday surprise parties that you have just memorable? :) Some more it's the last year, since we're secondary 4 that we have a chance to celebrate our birthdays with this group of friends. Just a thought of the moment.

Reason why i hang out with guys more than girls. Some times, i appreciate more of the brotherly kind of friendship (the bromance) more than the brittle fragile friendships with my girlfriends. They don't get stuck in the toilet for an hour or visit the toilet 5 times in a single outing. They don't get too emotional for no reason. (I admit that happens to me too as a girl, and hanging out with emotional people just doesn't get my day better). Lastly, they're always a bunch of jokers that makes me laugh so much. And i do mind my actions a lot, although i'm hanging out with a group of guys, i don't feel comfortable to put my arms over them when taking photos and stuffs. 随和是件好事，但随便是件坏事。  

Recently, i'm stuck in this weird state of mind, not knowing to continue hoping or just forget about you. It's silly to say to forget about you, because nothing really started, not even a proper friendship.

Even if it wouldn't last, i still wish to have a memory with you. I was dying to know you better so i went to read your horoscope. Yet i didn't dare to appear too straightforward infront of you, i didn't want to scare you off. But i really wanna be friends with you.