30 classes in 15 days?!
Hello readers,
It's kinda saddening how the number of readers I have came down to less than 20 when there was a good 100 in the past. :b I really spend a lot effort writing in these 'way too wordy' posts and I hope that more people can read what I write about my life! :D
Guess what, it's 4am and Lynette's just having insomnia ZZ. Finished learning 2 K-pop dances (not the whole dance LOL I was already halfway through) and drank water, ate food, nothing I did helps me to sleep. And I have 5 classes tmr, starting from 11am @ JCube.. I know I will survive with the lack of sleep but it's just a tiny little bit frustrating how I can't sleep at the time i'm supposed to sleep.
I used to tell people that I have no insomnia problems, I guess I'm wrong. I do have insomnia. Just that each time I overwork myself so much that I can sleep with ease. Now that the holidays have been taking too longgg, sincerely wishing for school to start again to drain all this energy the shit out of me. I have no idea why I have so much energy. Maybe it's through training of rigorous school and dance schedules, that this lax life is too not energy consuming for me xD
And I'm not a light sleeper just FYI. I sleep like a log. JUST RECENTLY, I find myself shifting around right and left a lot (subconscious), proving that i'm actually not in deep sleep (PLAYS T_T).. They say people don't have good quality of sleep when you face anxiety. Although I'm not sure is there any anxiety in my life at the moment, at least it's not showing up in areas I know.. Somehow my lower quality of sleep is like a pre-warning that my body is giving.. is it.. ? :( I basically have a YOLO attitude to life and decisions most of the time and I just make the best of what I have, so I don't really WORRY... anxiety wasn't really a problem of my type. Maybe I have no anxiety towards issues that I have control in, (AKA myself and my things), rather more towards my relationship with people :( I find myself getting scared, insecured, worried about what will happen to us in the future. I'm sorry I really wanna put 100% confidence and trust in you. I'm still suppressing all these insecurities from you because I don't wanna become clingy and needy. I know I should put 100% trust in you, but sorry I think the evil side of being a girl is just catching up on me. Over thinking, insecurities. THESE ARE WORDS THAT I DON'T EVEN USE THAT OFTEN. Please, let me be braver and have faith in that things will turn out well. And well, is to be perceived by my best way. :)
It's kinda saddening how the number of readers I have came down to less than 20 when there was a good 100 in the past. :b I really spend a lot effort writing in these 'way too wordy' posts and I hope that more people can read what I write about my life! :D
Guess what, it's 4am and Lynette's just having insomnia ZZ. Finished learning 2 K-pop dances (not the whole dance LOL I was already halfway through) and drank water, ate food, nothing I did helps me to sleep. And I have 5 classes tmr, starting from 11am @ JCube.. I know I will survive with the lack of sleep but it's just a tiny little bit frustrating how I can't sleep at the time i'm supposed to sleep.
I used to tell people that I have no insomnia problems, I guess I'm wrong. I do have insomnia. Just that each time I overwork myself so much that I can sleep with ease. Now that the holidays have been taking too longgg, sincerely wishing for school to start again to drain all this energy the shit out of me. I have no idea why I have so much energy. Maybe it's through training of rigorous school and dance schedules, that this lax life is too not energy consuming for me xD
And I'm not a light sleeper just FYI. I sleep like a log. JUST RECENTLY, I find myself shifting around right and left a lot (subconscious), proving that i'm actually not in deep sleep (PLAYS T_T).. They say people don't have good quality of sleep when you face anxiety. Although I'm not sure is there any anxiety in my life at the moment, at least it's not showing up in areas I know.. Somehow my lower quality of sleep is like a pre-warning that my body is giving.. is it.. ? :( I basically have a YOLO attitude to life and decisions most of the time and I just make the best of what I have, so I don't really WORRY... anxiety wasn't really a problem of my type. Maybe I have no anxiety towards issues that I have control in, (AKA myself and my things), rather more towards my relationship with people :( I find myself getting scared, insecured, worried about what will happen to us in the future. I'm sorry I really wanna put 100% confidence and trust in you. I'm still suppressing all these insecurities from you because I don't wanna become clingy and needy. I know I should put 100% trust in you, but sorry I think the evil side of being a girl is just catching up on me. Over thinking, insecurities. THESE ARE WORDS THAT I DON'T EVEN USE THAT OFTEN. Please, let me be braver and have faith in that things will turn out well. And well, is to be perceived by my best way. :)
Comments
Post a Comment